It Came From Ohio! Read online

It didn’t stop, of course, and I didn’t get off. Yet for a few moments there, as the coaster started down, I thought, I’m a dead man—this is it!

  It wasn’t. What it was, was a safe, unforgettable thrill. The feeling I hope I achieve in every Goosebumps book.

  Goosebumps had become the bestselling book series of all time. It led to a TV show, home videos, T-shirts, games, puzzles, and more scary products than I could have ever imagined!

  In 2012, we celebrated the twentieth anniversary of the Goosebumps series. We did the first ever Goosebumps book in hardcover. It was called Goosebumps Wanted: The Haunted Mask. Twenty years of writing these books is very scary!

  Kids always ask me how it feels to be famous. I can’t really answer that question—because I don’t feel any different than I ever did. I think the BIG difference in my life is that I’m writing all the time now!

  One of the nicest things about my success is the wonderful mail I receive. There were times when I received over two thousand letters a week! My mail carrier hated me—but I love reading all the letters from readers, parents, teachers, and librarians.

  It’s so nice of everyone to take the time to write to me. Sometimes the letters are very funny. Once, a boy wrote to me and asked: “When you die, can I take over your series?”

  One of my favorite letters came from a boy who wrote: “Dear R.L. Stine, I’ve read forty of your books—and I think they’re really boring!”

  I work six or seven days a week, plotting and writing my scary books. I work very hard, but I cannot take all of the credit for the books. I have had many wonderful editors who have helped me.

  In the early days of Goosebumps, Susan Lurie and Heather Alexander were two of my Goosebumps editors. They worked very hard to make sure each story was as good as the last. They told me when a story was too scary. And they told me when a story wasn’t scary enough. And they told me when a story wasn’t a story at all!

  When I turned in the first draft of A Night in Terror Tower, the two kids in the book—Eddie and Sue—spent the entire story running, running, running. They ran through the tower, ran from the Executioner, ran from present day to the past.

  Susan and Heather both saw problems. They thought maybe Eddie and Sue should slow down to catch their breath once in a while. They thought all that running was boring. I did a lot of rewriting on that book—and now the kids run for only half the book! A big improvement.

  The Girl Who Cried Monster takes place in a creepy library with a librarian who is actually a monster. When I wrote the book the first time, the monster librarian ate children who came to the library.

  Susan and Heather thought that eating children was too gross for Goosebumps. So I put a jar of turtles and snails on the librarian’s desk. When he gets hungry, he reaches into the jar and gobbles up a turtle or snail.

  I actually think that’s even more gross than eating children. For one thing, snails and turtles make a much better crunching sound when you chew them!

  I hate to revise. I think all writers do. I’m always eager to get on to the next story. I hate to go back and fix up the old one. But I’m lucky to have so many talented editors today to help me. They force me to make each book as good as it can be. (And they warn me when I’ve used the name Chuck for a character three books in a row!)

  While I’m thanking people, I need to thank the artists who started out with me when those series debuted—Bill Schmidt, who painted the Fear Street covers, and Tim Jacobus, who painted the wonderful Goosebumps covers each month.

  The idea for the Goosebumps TV show came from readers’ letters. As soon as I started writing Goosebumps, I began receiving letters from kids asking to see the stories on TV.

  It was so exciting for me to see my characters and crazy plots come to life on TV every week. I watched it every week—even the reruns!

  The first Goosebumps book we turned into a TV show was The Haunted Mask. This story came from something that happened in real life.

  One Halloween, my son, Matt, tried on a green rubber Frankenstein mask. He pulled it down over his head—and then he couldn’t get it off!

  He tugged and tugged, but the mask wouldn’t come off. I suppose I should have helped him remove it—but instead I ran to my desk and started writing notes. I knew it would make a great plot for a story!

  In the TV show, a wonderful actress named Kathryn Long played the part of Carly Beth, the girl who puts on the terrifying Haunted Mask. Kathryn worked very hard to make each scene real.

  In an early scene, two boys are teasing Carly Beth. At lunchtime, they give her a sandwich with a worm in it. Carly Beth doesn’t see the worm. She takes a big bite of sandwich, chews it, and swallows it.

  When we filmed that scene, we planned to use a rubber worm in the sandwich. But Kathryn said no. “We need a real worm,” she insisted. “I can’t really play the scene right unless we use a real worm.”

  So we put a real worm in the sandwich. And Carly Beth bit into it, chewed it up, and swallowed it.

  Do you think that’s disgusting?

  Here’s the worst part: We had to shoot the scene twelve times!

  (But that’s show biz—right?)

  I love visiting schools and making appearances at bookstores. I love meeting my readers. And, wow!—what a difference from that day in 1978 when only one kid showed up!

  A while ago, I returned to my hometown of Columbus to do a bookstore signing. The traffic was so snarled that the driver had to let me out two blocks away. At first, I thought that a car accident was blocking the street. But then I realized that all the cars were bringing people to see me!

  I had caused my first traffic jam!

  Another book signing was scarier than anything I’ve ever written. It happened at a mall near Washington, DC.

  I was invited to spend two hours at a Reading Is Fundamental book fair. The organizers were prepared for seven hundred people. But more than five thousand people jammed the mall to see me!

  They had to turn off all the escalators so that no one would get crushed. Security guards and local police officers had to be called in.

  I was stunned. What a thrill that so many people wanted to meet me! Unfortunately, there was no way I could possibly talk to all five thousand fans in just two hours.

  I had to climb up on a bench and shout through a megaphone: “Thank you for coming! But I cannot meet you all today! Please go home! Please go home!”

  I needed a police escort to get in and out of the store. I really thought there might be some kind of riot.

  That was real-life scary.

  Scary and thrilling at the same time.

  Most of my book signings aren’t that exciting. But there have been some wonderful moments.

  When I appeared at a bookstore in Dallas, Texas, a boy of about nine approached shyly. His mother was right behind him. Gently, she pushed him forward.

  “Go ahead,” the mother said, “ask Mr. Stine to sign your book.”

  The boy looked up. He had a well-worn copy of Monster Blood.

  “Are you really R.L. Stine?” the boy asked me.

  “I really am,” I assured him. “And what’s your name?”

  He told me. We shook hands and I asked him if he’d like me to sign his book.

  He nodded and handed Monster Blood to me. I wrote a short message to him and signed my name.

  The boy thanked me, took the book, and stared at my signature. As he moved away, he turned to his mother with a big smile on his face, and I heard him say, “I’m the luckiest man on earth!”

  Something about the smile on his face and the way he said those words really moved me. To think that my stories could mean that much to someone!

  Well, I had tears in my eyes. I had to turn away and catch my breath.

  Moments like those make all the hard work worthwhile.

  Moments like those make me feel like I’m the luckiest man on earth. And I really am. I have fans everywhere.

  I never imagined that one day my writing would ta
ke me all over the world. Sometimes I can’t believe where I’ve been and what I’ve seen and all the new and strange things that have happened to me.

  One of the really cool things about being a writer is having your books translated into lots of different languages. And sometimes, if you’re a really lucky author, you get to travel to faraway countries and meet the readers around the world who are reading your books.

  In 2009, I went to China and visited five cities—Beijing, Xi’an, Hangzhou, Ji’nan, and Shanghai. I thought China was really amazing. Everything was huge. The bookstores I visited were enormous, much bigger than the bookstores in the United States. In Shanghai, the bookstore had seven floors, and it was the size of a Wal-Mart. It was filled with people reading and buying books.

  I was so surprised when huge crowds came to my book signings. Hundreds and hundreds of kids lined up so I could autograph their books. I lived halfway around the world from these kids—and they were reading and enjoying my books. How amazing is that?

  And here’s something else that was pretty great. In China, they love surprises, and they love giving presents. After my tour was over, I was presented with a huge banner that had the signatures of ALL the kids who came to see me from ALL the different bookstores around the country. I didn’t know it, but after I had signed my name in their books, the kids were taken to a room where they each signed their names on a great big cloth banner.

  I have that banner hanging up in my house on the wall that I face when I write. Every time I look at it, it really does inspire me to write.

  While I was in China, I did some sightseeing, too. I visited the Great Wall of China and saw the Terracotta Warriors—a whole army of statues made of clay. And I ate great Chinese food. I love Chinese food, but sometimes the food was a little strange. One day someone served me a big bowl of fish heads.

  Which part of the head am I supposed to eat? I wondered. Which part is best?

  In the end, it didn’t matter.

  I wasn’t brave enough to eat any part.

  Now you know one of the things that scares me.

  People who work in publishing in China give themselves American names. That’s because their Chinese names are too difficult for Americans to pronounce. One young man asked me my advice. “I want a strong American name,” he said. “Tell me a name.”

  I’m a baseball fan, so I told him to take the name Derek. “You will be named after Derek Jeter.” I told him that Derek was one of America’s best baseball players.

  He loved it. He took the name Derek. Even his family started calling him Derek!

  Want to know what they call me in China?

  The publisher made up a Chinese last name for me. It is Kong Bu, which means “Scary.” It really gave me goosebumps!

  I got goosebumps when I went to Australia, too—but that’s because I had entered a parallel universe …

  Have you ever been someplace that looked totally familiar and totally strange at the same time?

  That’s how I felt in 2006 when I visited Australia.

  I was signing books at the Brisbane book festival. Book festivals in the United States are just a few days long. But in Brisbane, the festival lasts a whole week!

  Australia is very much like the United States … the buildings, the people … I felt right at home. But then, when I took a good look around, I saw that they weren’t the same at all. When I looked closely, all the plants seemed different to me. There were eucalyptus trees everywhere. You could smell them wherever you went. And the animals—wombats, wallabies, dingoes—they were different, too. There were signs in parks and public areas that said: PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE IBIS. Ibis?

  I felt like I was in an alternate universe.

  Turns out an ibis is a very big bird. It’s around 25–30 inches long, with white feathers, a bald black head, and a long beak. If you feed them, their population can grow out of control. Kind of like pigeons. But totally different. See what I mean? It was a strange feeling. Where am I? I thought. How could a place that seemed so familiar be so different at the same time?

  I remembered this experience when I wrote Goosebumps Most Wanted #1: Planet of the Lawn Gnomes. In that book, a boy named Jay moves to a new town, and at first it seems pretty much like his old town. But then he starts to notice that things aren’t really the same. There are birds called buzzard hawks that he’s never seen or heard of before, fish with legs, and all those lawn gnomes. Strange. Very strange.

  I met lots of terrific fans in Australia, and I saw the Great Barrier Reef. It’s the largest coral reef in the world. I went snorkeling there. And it was my first time ever in a wet suit!

  How did I get here? I asked myself. How did I go from sitting in my apartment at my desk to swimming on the other side of the world? I never imagined that writing books for kids would lead me to this.

  And it wasn’t the first time I had asked myself that question …

  It was 2003 and I was seated at a large banquet table in a golden room. The walls and ceiling glittered with gold. The tables were set with fancy china dishes and gleaming silver. Crystal glasses sparkled at every place setting.

  I couldn’t believe where I was.

  I was in Moscow, Russia. In the Kremlin. Many buildings—palaces, cathedrals, and towers—make up the Kremlin. It is the center of the Russian government. It’s where the president of Russia lives. And there I was—having dinner in the Kremlin.

  And I had been invited to go there with the first lady of the United States!

  First Lady Laura Bush, wife of President George W. Bush, invited three children’s book authors to go with her to the Moscow International Book Fair. Marc Brown and Peter Lerangis were two of the authors. I was the third. She chose me because she said the Goosebumps books were everywhere in her house. Her daughters loved them.

  Three hundred librarians from all over Russia were at the banquet. Did you know that Mrs. Bush used to be a librarian, too? Before she met the president, she was a school librarian, and she has always been very interested in getting kids to read.

  Mrs. Bush sat with Mrs. Lyudmila Putin, who, at that time, was the wife of the president of Russia. First ladies from all around the world were there. Musicians in tuxedos played music as we ate.

  From Ohio to the Kremlin. Amazing, right?

  It was great meeting the Russian children at the book fair. I told them how excited I was to be there. I told them that I had never been to Russia, but that my four grandparents came from there. I told them that being in the birthplace of my family made the trip extra special.

  I was having a fabulous time.

  The people were warm and friendly.

  I loved going sightseeing.

  It was all perfect. Except for the times when I found myself in great danger.

  My heart raced and my stomach twisted in fear. It happened each time I had to go out—in traffic!

  In Moscow, there are no traffic lights. It’s chaos. Sometimes you can’t make a turn because no one will stop for you. The police have little blue lights on top of their cars. Sometimes the people put little blue lights on top of their cars so that they can get through the traffic! It was a real nightmare!

  When it was time to go home, we flew back on Mrs. Bush’s private plane. Mrs. Bush had an entire apartment on the plane with a living room, a dining room, all kinds of rooms. Behind her apartment was the cabin where we sat. It was very comfortable. We sat in big leather chairs and ate great Tex-Mex food. In the next cabin was the Secret Service. They protect the First Lady. Then, way in the back, in the last cabin, sat the news reporters.

  I wonder where I would have sat if Mrs. Bush knew that I wasn’t just an author. I was an author who also did a seal act.

  That’s right. An act—with a dancing seal.

  I know you’re going to want to hear about that.

  I’ll get to the dancing seal act in a minute. First I have to tell you about the Haunted Lighthouse.

  R.L. Stine’s Haunted Lighthouse was a 4-D film tha
t was shown at SeaWorld and Busch Gardens.

  A 4-D movie is like a 3-D movie, only better! You wear the special glasses—that’s the 3-D part. The 4-D is the part where the audience gets tortured! The seats are wired with special effects, like buzzers that go off and vibrate at just the right time during the movie for a really good scare. When the ocean rolls in, the 3-D part makes it look real. The 4-D makes it feel real. Water jets under the screen soak the audience!

  In 2003, I visited the theme parks where the movie was playing. But I didn’t know I was about to become a part of a live seal show.

  The seal act was at the San Diego SeaWorld. My job was to tell the seal what to do.

  I was very nervous.

  What if the seal won’t listen to me?

  What if I’m a total flop?

  Why did I say I would do this?

  Will anyone notice if I leave right now?

  My legs were shaking as I took the stage.

  The seal looked calm.

  He was huge. Much bigger than I had imagined.

  Here goes, I thought.

  I told the seal to clap.

  He clapped. He did a great job.

  I took a deep breath.

  I told the seal to dance.

  He looked at me blankly. At least I thought it was a blank look. It’s hard to tell with a seal.

  But then—he danced.

  The audience went crazy.

  They loved us.

  What a team! We were a hit! This was great! I was an author with a seal act! For about ten minutes.

  The seal was hired for the next show.

  I wasn’t.

  That’s show biz, I guess. I went to the San Antonio SeaWorld in Texas, but I wasn’t asked to perform my seal act.

  When I left Texas, airport security at that time was very high.

  Sometimes people were pulled out of line and searched.

  Maybe it was because I always wear black, but guess what? A security guard approached me. “You’ve been selected to be searched,” he said. He took me off the line.